A letter to my boss

Dude, i know that you feel sorry for yourself because you never amounted to anything. I understand that you feel the need to exert your modicum of power every chance you get because work is the only place you get to show it but really, be human. Don't bully people into working when they really can't. Don't make underhanded comments that are offensive and then get pissed off when people call you out on it. No, doctors are not glorified-college-graduates who can sew. I understand it was a joke but once you push peoples buttons long enough it stops being funny. Ohh and really, you shouldn't snicker under your breath and make snide remarks when there is a huge shipment that i have to stock. Yeah it's funny that you don't have to do it yourself but you know what, at least i still can lift these boxes. Is that the reason you don't offer to help with the heavy ones? Cause you cant?

Ohh and little prissy boy. Really, our job is NOT hard. Why does it take you 3 hours to do a job that takes me 30 minutes? Why do you feel like you are better than everyone else? You are not special! Ohh and really, no one cares that you broke up with your boyfriend this week or that you dropped out of law school to pursue your "dream" which you have since not been able to identify.

And to the stupid people who i encounter every day....screw you. Why would you call FedEx to come pick up a package at our office when you AREN'T here yet? Why do you stay after closing time every night when you know full well what time we close, you aren't dumb (at least in theory). Why would you come to the office and do things that don't count as work (surf the internet, leave and get coffee) and expect me to say you were here?

If everyone could just leave me alone today, it would be great. kthxbye

On a sweeter note...

but not necessarily a happier one


"Fidelity": Don't Divorce... from Courage Campaign on Vimeo.

Not to be bitchy but....

Have you seen the movie Idiocracy? It was worth seeing once, the premise is that 1000 years from now the planet is filled with really dumb people because all the smart people put off having babies for their careers or only have 1 or 2 children, while the dumb people replicate like rabbits therefore diluting the gene pool.
I can't help but think of that movie in the last two weeks with the story of the octuplets that have been born. Now don't get me wrong, i like babies. I encourage people to have children, even multiple children. But how is it responsible to have 14 babies in 6 different pregnancies when you are living out of your mother's house, without income? How is it that people i know who CHOOSE not to have children because they know it's not the right thing for them to do have people looking down their noses at them while this idiot and people in similar situations like the Duggar family (who granted have spaced their 18 children out and have enough income to stay afloat without the government) get their own tv shows and hours of news media attention?
And what doctor in his right mind would implant 6 embryos at once, i understand the necessity to implant more than one, really i get it, IVF fails in most cases but if you were a doctor who had done 5 other IVF procedures on this woman which produced 6 children, why would you risk implanting 6 embryos knowing full well there was a possibility that they could all take?
The guy i feel the worst for in this situation though is the poor schmuck that donated his sperm when this chick asked him 8 years ago for him to help her have A child. I bet he is shitting his pants knowing that now he has 14 biological children with a mother with no means of income. Poor dude.
Anyway, enough bitching for now, happy monday!

I know, I know

So i have been conspicuously absent from my blog recently. Partially because i haven't had anything interesting to write about and partially because i have exactly zero time. So i guess it's update time. DH and I are both doing well, if very busy. As of today DH has started his fourth week in the fire academy. It is kicking his butt but he seems to be enjoying the process and the brotherhood. I have been working ALOT but it's about to get worse. As it stands DH has to leave the house by about 5:30 or 5:45 to get out to the academy on time. For those of you who know me, I don't exist that early in the day. This schedule also means that he is in bed by 8:00 like an old man. Therefore, depending on my schedule at work i get to see him for a couple of hours over dinner or not at all. This are going to begin to get interesting as well this month because along with the ACT class I am teaching at the local-can't-pull-our-heads-out-of-our-asses-high-school. I am also going to begin to drive an hour down to bumfuck to teach an MCAT class two nights a week from 6-9 at my alma mater.
Anyway, enough with the bitching. Last night held a welcome respite from all of this back and forth working and scheduling. We went to DH's fire recruit class Super Bowl Party. We had a blast. I got to meet many of the men he's been working with and I liked all of them. Which was great seeing as how recently i've grown tired of the immaturity of DH's friends. These boys had exactly the right amount of immaturity and boy were they funny. I even got some really great pictures of the festivities.























DH and the boys pigging out before the party even starts




















The boy's posing to see who is prettiest.






Tailgaiting, litteraly!







All the boys at the end of the night

Best quote of the night

"I will noogie you bald, bitch" - Dr. T

I love this dude

And for those of you who have been living under a rock for the last year, the original

Guest Blog by El Oso

Overtime it seems many people have forgotten the most important ingredient to a good gaming experience - the good game.
And by good game I don't mean shader effects, high polygon counts, compelling story lines or any of the other irrelevant nonsense that I don't give a submarining fuck about. I mean the actual game play. The part where you control stuff have it interact with other stuff and your brain generates fun. If i wanted a compelling story, I'd read a book. There are only a few million already in existence, the majority of which are written by people whose talents compare to the best video game writer's the same way Kobe Bryant's penis might compare to that of an poorly endowed tit mouse. If 90 minutes of cut scenes dubed with pornography grade voice acting sounds exciting to you I suggest you immediately navigate your web browser to the local torrent site and download something called a movie. Any one really since apparently you are easily satisfied.
Perhaps i romanticize about the past here but I remember a time when most games were about being challenged to explore new game play mechanics. About learning and solving new puzzles about employing your skills against all types of adversary and about feeling proud of your accomplishments.
Now the mostly shiny particle effected vessels guiding any soccer mom caliber gamer through a generally third grade level story where anyone with a brain the size of a steroid shrunken testicle can pretend to be a hero and maintain a fantasy of not sucking balls at video games.
"But...But I need a background story"...do you really need a background story to play Donkey Kong - you twat?? How about poker or football? If the process of playing a game isn't fun for you - maybe you're not a gamer. Not that i am unappreciative for all my free kills in WoW. But lately I've become rather miffed at the notion, that this overwhelming number of noobs has negatively influenced the direction of video game design forever. Instead of humanity persuing the development of the next chess we have an endless supply of 8 hour long interactive B-movie experiences at $60 a pop with unimaginative reskinned sequals announced exactly 3 seconds after the current product is launched.
Congratulations Noobs you've effectively raised an army of consumer gaming zombies who conviently seem to lack no only artistic standards but opposable thumbs. I'd be inclined to look the other way and ignore the thumbless zombie parade but the bummbling whiners have the audacity to hate on us - the gamers that are playing the game for game play. But the truth is the only imbalance is coming from your underdeveloped inner ear you uncoordinated ball of ghey. I'm truly sorry you got your clumsy ass kicked around in gym class like a hacky sack in the 1980's But that's no reason to be a sandy crotch while I'm kicking your ass in Super Smash Brothers. Even more infurinating than the consumer zombie noobs are the noobs whose job it is to play video games then criticize them for mass public consumption.
The champions of mob mentality shouldn't bother me since i've grown rather accustomed to unqualified nitwits performing undeserved jobs.
Within gaming media circles being a noob seems to have become some sort of fucking prerequisite. I know going through life with a lack of a pinch grip may be frustrating but calling a 3 hour single player experience the hight of game design and comparing the dialoge of GTA4 to that of the godfather is nothing less than absolutely retarded.
Here is the unpleasent truth. Your teachers lied to you when they said any one, even you, could be an astronaut. Some people are just naturally better at doing things. There IS something called talent. No matter how hard i try I'll never paint a Mona Lisa or invent the quantum computer. No matter how hard you try you'll never beat Contra without cheating. Many people have a genuine desire to be better this doesn't make them alien or crude it just makes them a gamer. It's no reason to resent them at least no more than you resent John Holmes for his enormous cock.
So the next time you think "I can beat all the pro gamers if I just played as much as them" -Think again. All the basket ball training in the world won't let your pudgy 5''4' dimpled bottom make the NBA. Just like all the Starcraft training in the world couldn't prevent Park Sung-Joon from sticking his golden mouse up your ass.